Let Siblings Fight

My friend “Sadie” grew up in a household where she and her sister were not allowed to fight.

In fact, if they did fight, her mother always sided with her younger sister. Her mother never listened to her side of the story; even when they were in high school.

This was a huge disservice “Sally’s” parents did for her and her sister. The siblings never learned how to resolve a fight.

1. During the last two years of high school, “Sally” and her sister only talked when they had to.
   
2. Today “Sally” avoids conflict at all costs and her sister won’t let things go until she has her way.
   
3. The siblings are just acquaintances today.

Let your children deal with the bickering and minor fights without intervention. Of course you want to set some boundaries regarding name calling and raised voices. And help them to use their "I" messages to move closer to resolution.

Obviously you’ll interfere when it escalates; but by allowing your children to resolve their issues themselves allows them to learn a valuable life lesson.

Do you let your children fight? What are the rules that you have set regarding fighting? I’d love to hear about it.

Let Your Child Fail

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Let Your Child Fail

Are You An Entrepreneur
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In the recent past I’ve come across two similar situations which I find shocking; maybe I’m too straight and narrow.

One mother wrote her 3rd grade daughter’s book reports (monthly) because her daughter hated writing and refused to write them.

In another case, I was talking to one of the middle school teachers regarding a recent event that showed off the 6th grader’s Egyptian projects. I told her I had enjoyed looking at the projects and some of them were pretty neat. She mentioned that quite a few of her students’ parents had completed the projects.

To my shocked face she responded that she knew the type of work her students were capable of and some of the projects were definitely the work of the parents.

I really do think it is a disservice to the child for the parent to do the child’s work.
(1) What is the message the parent is giving the child?
-You work is not good enough.
(2) Is the parent going to do the child’s projects through high school and college?
-I don’t think so. Then when will the child learn how to do a project? Better to learn this at a younger age than an older one.

The experience and skills a child learns by planning or not planning (and failing or having challenges) and doing a project are life skills. To plan a dinner, a garden, a ski trip or rebuild a car; it takes thinking thoroughly to plan and execute. And yes, it’s okay to fail because there’s learning in the failing.

What are your thoughts about this? Do you agree or disagree? I’d love to hear your thoughts.

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ARE YOU AN ENTREPRENEUR?

There is a book launch happening this coming Monday and if you are an entrepreneur you don’t want to miss it.

Think Two Products Ahead by Ben Mack is bringing the big advertising companies secret of branding and explaining it in layman’s terms.

To find out more go to (It’s best to cut and paste this link to your browser since it is so long.)
http://www.thinktwoproductsahead.com/

Reading For Fun

Studies show that 92% of kids say they enjoy
reading for fun; however only 3 out of 10 read for
fun everyday. In fact, once kids reach the age of
8, those who read every day for fun drops from
40% to 29%.

The main reason given for not reading; kids can’t
find anything interesting to read. Reading holds
so much for our children: vocabulary, a healthy
way to spend their time, learning more about
themselves and the world and much more.

It is tricky finding books of interest. We’ve
bought books that my son hasn’t liked,
and if they’re in new condition, I return it, if my
son has let the condition deteriorate a bit; I
donate it either to his class room or to the local
shelter, hoping another teen will enjoy them.

My suggestion is to ask the librarian; ask the
proprietor of the small specialty book store and
of course the employees at the big book stores. I
continue to find different people to get more and
more suggestions; I don't want my son to stop
reading for fun.

This same study also noted that children of
parents who ready daily are more likely to be
readers. However, if you aren’t a daily reader you
can still help your child be one by making sure
your child has an interesting book to read.

For me, I try to read 1 of every 4-5 books my son
reads. Not only do I want to know what kind of
books he’s interested in, it also gives us more
fodder for communication.

How do you promote your kid’s interest in
reading?

Choices

A friend and I were talking about choices. I mentioned that I always give my children choices; you can pick up your clothes or go to time out or you can take a bath now or in 20 minutes.

My friend told me her parents never gave her choices. In fact, when her son turned 3 and was ready for a big boy’s bed, she allowed him to pick out his sheets and bed spread ( a farm scene.) When she mentioned this to her mother, her mother exclaimed “I never let you do that.”

My friend still has a hesitancy in making choices. With this understanding she’s allowing her children to make choices: sheets, where to go to dinner, what game to play and more.

our children, big and small, need to experience making choices and living with the consequences of their choices.

What kind of choices are you allowing your child to make?